Time Heals.

9 Days Post-Op

Still not 100% but each day I'm feeling stronger. I'm not sure why I thought I would be down just a couple days then back to myself... I really underestimated my healing time! A trip to Wal-Mart Saturday was enough to let me know even 8 days out I'm still not up to par! I go back to work tomorrow and I'm praying I will make it through the day without needing to lay down.

 

I still have stitches in my abdomen and under my arm - both are not good spots! What is really driving me INSANE is the incision under my arm.... I'm not allowed to wear deodorant or shave that armpit - I feel like a stinky, stubbly mess! If I don't get the OK soon, I will look like I'm manufacturing trolls in my armpit! UH! I still have steri- strips on both incisions - I asked Philip what Dr. V said about removing them and he said Dr. V said they will come off on their own... hmmm they are pretty much super glued in place! Even after several showers... they aren't budging! I go for my 2 week post-op exam this coming up week, if Dr. V thinks he's gonna pull those super glued steri-strips off my incision he's got another thing comin'! No way in hell these strips are coming off without a fight... and this ol' girl isn't wanting an incision dehiscence due to pulling those damn sticky stubborn strips off. Rain Check please?! 

My armpit is still very swollen - actually it feels like a hard golf ball on fire... I know my descriptions of things can be pretty flippin' crazy but I know you get the point. It's a golf ball size knot that feels that its burning on the inside.... there you go. 

I've had so many mixed emotions lately. I hate to look at my body in fear of finding something new. As a matter of fact I did find a black knot 3 days post-op that I need to have checked. I will have to put that off until the week after next due to this week being so full of other appointments. But it is definitely on my list. I have so much fear within me because I know the high occurrence rate of Melanoma. No one can ever really fathom how I feel unless you have been through the hell journey of cancer. I ponder, will my life ever actually be "normal" due to the fact that I will ALWAYS worry if and when cancer will try to regain control over my life?? When will the beast show itself again???  These are just a few of the thoughts I have on a daily basis. 

Onto more happier thoughts ----> This past week I became a proud Mimi to a beautiful baby girl:) Adalyn Reese was born on 9/27 weighing 6 pounds 3 ounces and 19 1/2 inches long. She's a clone of her daddy for sure! I'm so in love with her - she just absolutely melts my heart. Corey and Andrew done a wonderful job <3 

 

So, not only did I become a member of the Cancer Club - I joined the Mimi Club this year. Screw the Cancer Club - the benefits of being a member suck! They require too many sick days and the cost is astronomical! The Mimi Club - aww the benefits are so heart fulfilling. The love is so unconditional which hard to get in any club these days. I'll be 38 years young in 9 days, I'm a mother and now a Mimi and I couldn't be any happier:) 

 

 

XOXO - Melanoma Diva