Saturday, January 7, 2012

New Year. New Me.

WHAT A YEAR IT'S BEEN!
A LITTLE ABOUT ME:)
Name: Billie
Age: 38
Favorite Color: Pink 
Favorite Food: A big juicy medium well cooked ribeye steak:)
Favorite Hobby: Photography
Favorite Book: Vivian Maier: Street Photographer

HIGHLIGHTS FROM 2011

Greatest Lesson Learned:  Life is short - live today as if it were your last...
Hardest Thing of the Year: Being diagnosed with Malignant Melanoma and facing the "unknown" journey of the beast, & my lil man breaking his leg and being in a wheelchair x 2 months!
Favorite Memory: My beautiful grand-daughter Adalyn's birth
What I Loved Most About 2011:  Being alive and spending time with my family....

LOOKING FORWARD TO 2012

Want To: Spend more time doing my photography and definitely kickin up my fitness
Hope To: Have good positive news on ANY and ALL skin lesions, biopsies
Biggest Goal: Try to remain positive throughout the year even when life throws curves...



FUCK YOU 2011!


Wow, Twenty-Twelve is here... and it's a Leap Year! I wonder how many men will receive marriage proposals on February 29th and how many will give scissors or gloves in return instead of a "YES".... LOL  (Yep, just an ol' wives' tale)

This past Thursday I had my 3 month skin exam. I left feeling somewhat defeated and disappointed - not only did she find a "suspicious" area on my mid back that she would like to watch but the entire visit was a major cluster fuck for sure. It started with me being seen 1 hour after my scheduled time... OK, I can look past that - me being a nurse, I know "shit" happens to throw the schedule off. So, once I'm called back the nurse asks why I'm there, etc... then proceeds to ask me if I want to put a gown on for my visit.... "Ummm, well, I am here for a skin exam and I'm pretty sure my scrubs are NOT see-thru"... fuck yes lady I need a gown - DUH! OK, I'm stripped down and waiting another 20 minutes on the doc... she comes in and boy oh boy is she "scattered brained", one minute she is asking me to stand up and pull my gown up to check my legs, while I'm in action doing as she asks she jumps over to the computer reading documentation then bouncing back not to check my legs but my face! I'm privately thinking "WOW, there is medication for this type of behavior"... Long story short, my rosacea is worse so I stopped the finacea cream and started Metrogel. I have a 6 mm area on my left arm that bleeds -she says is superficial BCC and she will treat it with cream instead of cutting it out... the area on my back is 7mm elongated with slight redness freckle - she's gonna watch it... This disturbed me, why watch it when you can cut it out and be done with it. Why give the lil fucker time to invade my body and cause havoc??? Like I said, the visit was worse that having the shits in the middle of a field with only grass blades to wipe your ass with! I was her last patient of the morning - this lead me to believe she was in a hurry to get to lunch or whatever... When I checked out, I let the rude receptionist know that I do not want an appt at the same time, I would like my next appt early in the morning! I left feeling like I had a bad case of ADHD with my head spinning! OH, then I realized she sent me out the door with only the script for the Metrogel not the cream for the arm lesion... What a disappointment! 
I did learn one thing from that visit - I'm truly always gonna be looking over my shoulder (literally) waiting on the next "suspicious" area... Melanoma is no fucking joke people. It takes all your dignity and rips apart your life! No joke!
Tanning beds are bad news - if anything, I hope my story reaches others that frequent tanning beds and makes them really think and and realize what they are doing to their body. I wish I would have had just one person present their story to me as I was foolishly frying my skin - it would have opened my eyes! Are you still tanning???

2012 - I hope you bring me good news and happiness.

XOXO - Melanoma Diva